Unresolved Grief, What is it?

It is finally feeling like Spring around me. Flowers are blooming and the peepers are peeping! Nature is doing its thing and waking up. Finally:)

And by the way, that's a picture of my Mom, read on for why I have this lovely lady pictured.

In this blog post, I want to touch the surface of what unresolved grief really is, but first grief. According to (“ https://www.dictionary.com/browse/grief" ) “Grief is defined as mental or emotional suffering or distress caused by loss or regret. It's especially used to refer to the feeling of sorrow and loss from the death of a loved one.”

Grief is not only about a death of someone you loved, although that is the one most of us think about when the word is spoken. But, in fact, there are numerous loses that we grieve throughout our lives. Loss of a friendship, a job, a home, or not getting into a dream school, or making that team you tried out for are all examples of losses that we may grieve. The point is everyone grieves. Everyone.

So what is unresolved grief? Through all the work I have done as a Grief Recovery Specialist™, and through the Grief Recovery Method®, one aspect of unresolved grief is about the things “we wish we’d said or done differently, better or more.” Or to put it as my Mom would have, these are the, Could haves, Should haves, and Would Haves.

As an example, for me was that even though I was sure I had nothing left to say to my Mom, (pictured above in that fabulous skirt!). I had no doubt that she knew I loved her and I knew she loved me. However, after she died, and through this work, I realized there was more I wanted to say to her and hear. By working with a specialist and going through the steps I was able to complete these things that were left undone. So now when I think of my Mother, although I still miss her so much, and I do occasionally have tears that form, because naturally I wish she was here, more often than not, I remember her and a smile appears on my face as I recall a happy memory, rather than think of all the words that were left unsaid. Because, I believe, she deserves to be remembered with a smile.

If you want to learn more about The Grief Recovery Method® Please reach out or read more under the Grief Recovery tab.

Sending Peace to all, Jan